Pain isn’t Pretty

I once was told

“You are amazing!”

But that was when I was young

They never told me

That it would change when I got older

But it did.

See, people stopped telling me

How beautiful I was

And started telling me

That I was wrong.

That my hair was too thin,

That my hips were too small,

My skin was too pale,

And I’d never fit in.

At first I ignored it

I thought

“What a lie!”

But their words kept persisting

Every day and at night

It started to wear on me

It didn’t seem bad

And I thought I could handle it

(I am pretty strong)

But it turns out I’m not

Because now here I am

Staring at my arms

What have I done?

The scrapes in the scratches

Each with their own story

I heard they’re romantic

And even beautiful

But I’ll still never tell

This pain that I’m feeling

It’s right and it’s true

But I hate it I hate me

Why am I here?

The thing people don’t get

Is that this isn’t pretty

They said that it was

But I hate it even more

than myself.

The reason I do it now,

Is because I deserve it.

And I can’t find a way to stop

Because sometimes

The pain feels like the person

I think I am.

People will tell me I’m better than this

But right now it just doesn’t feel like I am.

I’m sorry that I’m not who you need

But I’m not.

Just please stay for a while

‘Cause I need you.

 

Hey guys! What’s up. Based off of the amount of views/likes I got on the post I put out on Sunday I will not be posting more of that style of post. I am enjoying the poetry and am still considering some sort of short story series. I will always be posting on Sundays, Tuesdays, Thursday, and Saturday all the time. I know this blog is nothing special. But every single one of the 15 followers I have or the people who have hit the like button are incredibly thankful for your support. Writing is everything to me and knowing someone else out there cares means everything. Thank you so, so much for reading and have a marvelous Tuesday!

 

Photographer is unknown

 

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